I can be glib all day long, mock and poke fun at Republicans, talk about Herman Cain's missteps on Fox, how he doesn't know what the Constitution says . . . about Bachmann and Palin and other gun-toting "mama grizzly" tea party prom queens who know nothing and seem content with that. I can do that all day long - but that's just a cover for something else. Real fear.
I find myself bewildered and frustrated and disheartened and, yes, scared, when I read day after day about the newest and latest attacks on our Democracy by the right-wingers: From union-busting, such asGovernor Scott Walkerlaid a shrine to in Wisconsin, toabortion-abolishing(49 states and 900+ anti-abortion measures), tocity-stealing(which Governor Rick Snyder effectively did to Benton Harbor, Michigan), toMedicare-trashing(which the Paul Ryan budget effectively does) . . . it goes on and on. And it scares me - because I can't get a grasp on the thinking behind any of it. Like many progressives, I flail around and try to make some sense out of the nonsensical: It's like trying to trust someone who's completely untrustworthy, trying to believe someone who never tells the truth, trying to put square pegs in round holes and herd cats and believe that snow comes up out of the ground like grass and blows around. I've read a lot of true crime books - about Ted Bundy, about child-killers Susan Smith and Diane Downs, about rapists and murderers and conscienceless sociopaths . . . I swear, I understand all of them better than I understand what the right-wing faction of our country now stands for. What I realize is that with true psychopaths - such as described in the true crime books - they don't really seem human . . . they're so lacking in empathy for their victims, I don't even attempt to apply normal human emotion and compassion. Where I veer off course is when I try to attach a human element to the Republicans who are trying to violate the core of our American values - because really, their lack of compassion and interest in the average person is so astoundingly careless and lacking in human emotion that it's like we're being raped, psychologically - these right-wing zealots are simply legislative serial killers.
I see so many similarities between true psychopaths and those who seek to legislative our values and morals, the "social engineers" who, without the slightest care or interest in anyone's plight, are attempting to upset the apple cart: With every new bill against abortion, with every new attack on unions, with every new bit of cruelty, another apple representing American values and American integrity tumbles out of the cart, leaving only the remnants of rotten apples that have oozed out, their rancid insides coating the inside of the cart with fermenting fruit. The Republican Party, to me, has become the party of fermenting fruit.
I don't know where to go from here, where to turn. I go to rallies, and stand with others who feel like I do; I write about the injustices, about the cruelty; along with other progressives, I try to make the world aware of what the stakes are. When I read about the outrages that Republicans are trying to foist on us, I get the same feeling I'd get walking in a dark parking lot at night and hearing footsteps behind me. There's a menace, a danger, and fight-or-flight adrenaline kicks in. I'm sure I'm not alone in admitting that sometimes - when I read about particularly unconscionable bills Republicans are trying to promote or statements they've made - I gasp out loud. Reading about severed body parts couldn't shock me more.